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I will try to create more happiness and less unhappiness in the world around me
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It's so easy to take each other for granted but an investment of
effort and attention in your closest relationship will pay
dividends in happiness - for you and your partner.
The quality of our closest relationships can have a huge impact on our own happiness and that of our partner. Historically, psychologists have spent time looking into what goes wrong in relationships. Although a relatively new field, there is a growing body of evidence about what makes relationships go right. 
There are many practical things we can do to enhance our closest relationships. Many of these are very simple, they just require some thought and conscious attention. Why not give them a try? You may be surprised how much difference they make.
According to social psychologist John Harvey, the key to growing and maintaining a good relationship is effort and persistence. He and his colleagues developed the 'Minding Model' of relationships to show what makes relationships last and grow - as summarised below. 
The sections below provide some suggestions to help build your skills in some of these areas.
Good communication is at the heart of happy relationships of all kinds. The good news is that communication skills (both listening and responding) can be learnt and practiced, just as we can practice any other life skill. Here are some simple rules:
Better and deeper communication leads to more compassion and less blame in a relationship. Which means fewer complaints and arguments! Psychologist John Gottman, a leading expert on relationships, says that the "magic ratio" for happy partnerships is 5:1 - five positive interactions for every negative one.
Here are a few ideas of how you can stick to this magic ratio...
 Harvey; Gottman; Gable and Reis (2001- 2003)
 Harvey,J.H, & Pauwels,B.G. (2009) Relationship connection: A redux on the role of minding and the quality of feeling special in the enhancement of closeness. In S.J. Lopez & C.R. Snyder (Eds.) OxfordHandbook of Positive Psychology. NY: Oxford University Press.
 Taken from 'Life enhancement Strategies', in Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology Chapter 13
 Maisel, N.C. & Gable, S.L. (2009) For richer…in good times…and in health: positive processes in relationships. In S.J. Lopez & C.R. Snyder (Eds.) Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology. NY: Oxford University Press.
See also Gable, SL, & Reis, HT (2010) 'Good news! Capitalizing on positive events in an interpersonal context', Zanna MP (Ed.), Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, and Hicks, A and Diamond, L 'How was your day? Couples' affect when telling and hearing daily events' Personal Relationships, 15 (2008), 205-228
Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples
How to attain more loving, supportive and deeply satisfying relationships
Why it Can Matter More Than IQ
Centre for Non-Violent Communication
Promotes NVC and helps people peacefully and effectively resolve conflict
How to listen to others and resolve conflicts
The Relationship Cure
Guide for building better connections with family, friends and lovers
The Seven Principles For Making Marriage Work
Teaches partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work
The Gottman Relationship Institute
Practical, science-based tools to help couples get back on track
Sustainable Marriage Quiz
How satisfied and committed are you to your relationship?
Promoting health, respect and justice in couple and family relationships
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We’ll be in touch soon to give you updates on how the movement is growing